2019 Card-vent Calendar: December 6

December 6, 2019:
1997-98 Fleer Ultra #14HT Tim Thomas Heir to the Throne

It was bound to happen eventually.  Every December something comes up and I miss a Card-vent deadline.  Things were a little busy last night, as Mrs. Thorzul was trying to solve some car issues, and I was stuck watching some of the neighbor kids after school and then making dinner.  Once the takeout fish fry got home, it was time to watch the first half of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone with the kids (I finished reading the first book aloud to them a few weeks ago), and after that came Bucks and bedtime.  I was required, of course, to watch the entirety of the absolute dismantling of the presumed NBA Championship favorite L.A. Clippers at the hands of Giannis and Co.  After that, I had a little catching up to do on the WWE Network, finishing up the excellent Broken Skull Sessions Stone Cold/Undertaker interview.  So yeah, I didn't have time to post between all that stuff.

When my neighbor picked his kids up, we actually talked cards for a few minutes.  He brought up that he had gone to his parents' house and pulled out his stash of junkwax era cards.  He showed me a few pictures he took of some 1986-1990 Brewers cards, and then we speculated about the Bucks/Clippers game for a bit.  Somehow Ray Allen's name came up.  Bringing this post full circle, Allen, who played with Tim Thomas in Milwaukee for a few seasons, was once quoted as saying, "If he wanted to, Tim Thomas could be the best player in the league."  Apparently Tim didn't want to.

Have a great Saturday, everyone.  I'll try to sneak in another post today somewhere between my daughter's first basketball game and whatever else the day may hold. 

2019 Card-vent Calendar: December 5

December 5, 2019:
1960 Fleer #56 Gene Cockrell

Not fair.  Going around, knocking guys down with a big-ass marshmallow.

Defensive lineman gets leveled by Cockrell, loses consciousness for a few seconds.  Trainer comes out with the smelling salts, he comes to.
Coach: "Williams!  What day is it today?"
Williams: "Marshmallow.  Got hit by a big-ass marshmallow."

And thus, the league took another baby step forward in the interest of player safety.  Studies linking the Big-Ass Marshmallow Era with Alzheimer's, pre-geriatric incontinence, fits of the vapors, and early death were never totally conclusive, relying more on correlation than causation.  Still, MABAM (Mothers Against Big-Ass Marshmallows), and other organizations like it, got their way.  The NFL came for the intra-end zone goal posts, but not before outlawing big-ass marshmallows.  Some of us are old enough to remember big-ass marshmallows kicking around the semi-pro circuit well into the late 1970s, but the once-familiar sounds of "POOF" emanating from the gridiron are now but a distant memory.  And the startup Dubuque Graham Crackers?  Well, let's just say the franchise never stood a chance.

Next Week - Third Base Moats: The Failed Experiment

2019 Card-vent Calendar: December 4

December 4, 2019:
1961 Topps #4 Lenny Green

That awkward moment, when you realize there are still 12 days of school left before Christmas Break, and you've just come back from Thanksgiving weekend and you've only been "teaching" for three days and it feels like 3,000 days and everything sucks.  Honestly, putting the Card-vent Calendar together is my daily highlight.  Thanks for reading, thanks for commenting, I'm trying to avoid having Lenny's "Say What???" face be my constant expression, but it's hard to avoid now.

The back of this card says that Lenny hit .318 in the "Sally League" in 1956.  That made me larf.

Oh, and The Mandalorian and Baby Yoda are my everything right now.  That and Card-vent.  I do it because I love it.

2019 Card-vent Calendar: December 3

December 3, 2019:
2017 Topps WWE Women's Division #WWE-21 La Luchadora

If there was anyone who absolutely OWNED 2019 who is not named Megan Rapinoe, it would be Becky Lynch.  Let's run down the list.

• First women's match to headline WrestleMania
• Victorious in said match
• "Becky Two Belts"
• THE MAN T-shirt
• The new inspired-by-The Bride ring gear
• Broke everyone's heart by getting engaged
• Discovered new ice cream flavor
• Top 5 Formula One points finish
• Entered Lhasa Apso in Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show, earned Best in Show
• Ran undetected Social Security scam, netting a cool $2.5K
• Guided party of billionaires down the Zambezi River, returning each one alive
• Made a really cool Etch-a-Sketch drawing of the Cure's Robert Smith

Yes' it's been a hell of a year.  Kind of makes you forget we're headed for only the third anniversary (12/20/2016) of this absolute trash pile of a gimmick.  Godspeed to you in 2020, Ms. Becky!

2019 Card-vent Calendar: December 2

December 2, 2019:
1975-76 Topps #240 Tony Esposito

Although the NHL's helmet rule would not take effect until the 1979-80 season, Tony was ahead of the curve.  In fact, the helmet he is pictured wearing here contained more padding than the letter of the law required, and came complete with a chinstrap.

Because advanced data from Esposito's era is not readily available, the best statisticians can do is estimate that Tony's helmet saved him from seven concussions and three dented skulls during the '74-75 season that saw Tony in action 71 times.

 

2019 Card-vent Calendar: December 1

Well, this year's Card-vent Calendar is a beaut, and it arrived just in time, too.  Post-Thanksgiving mail can be a little hit-or-miss, but this precious parcel showed up on my doorstep just in time.  A real classy one this year, the type of Christmas scene most of us can only dream of.  But since Card-vent is the time for sharing, let's kick off the First Annual Death Stare Cards Card-vent Calendar (and thirteenth overall).

December 1, 2019:
1993 Fleer Ultra #285 Kenny Rogers

HHHWWWWWHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Once Halloween passes, the days start flying past you, much like a Kenny Rogers fastball.  In the interest of enjoying the holiday season, however, Death Stare Cards suggests that you hit the throttle, take a few miles off your heater, and stop every so often to notice the good things in life.  If you bear down too much, try to force it, you'll end up blowing out your O-ring like Mr. Rogers here.

$10 Scumbucket Grab Bag 4.10

1993 Topps Chipper Jones Top Prospects

I noticed I had a little pile of cards just sitting on a shelf, and I soon realized it was the Scumbucket pile.  It had gone dormant back in June, but I'd still like someone to give them a good home for $10.



THE PILE
2005 Prime Patches Jason Jennings Jersey/Glove/Shoe Relic (149/150)

2014 Topps Craig Kimbrel Orange Parallel (186/199)

2014 Topps Trevor Plouffe Pink Parallel (11/50) 

 

1997 Donruss Chipper Jones Rocket Launchers (0330/5000)

2001 Pacific Peter Warrick Impact Zone 

 

2015 Topps Update Series Brett Gardner Sabermetric Stats Variation

2002 Fleer Tradition Plays of the Week Magglio Ordonez

1976 Topps Kurt Bevacqua Bubble Gum Blowing Champ
  

2002 Fleer Tradition Jose Vidro Glossy Parallel (067/200)